Archive | February 2014

I miss my Daddy 2



I miss my daddy

Tomorrow is the anniversary of my Dad’s death and I’m missing him today. This time of year always sucks for me. Mom’s death was in mid Feb. My brother’s birthday is on the 26th and Dad’s death was March 1st and his birthday was March 31. He would have been 98 if he was alive as it was, he made it to 86 and was the first male in his family to live that long because of accidents and illness to others.

I was listening to John McCutcheon’s Boys in Green and it always makes me think the stories Dad would tell me of what he did to get by during the Depression and then he’s swear me to secrecy to never tell my Mom.

He told me about his time in the CCC and about working in Yosemite to clear currant bushes and wild blackberries out because they were considered pests. That it had been hot and sticky work and that he would have thousands of pricks from thorns at the end of the day.

He told me about his time as a hobo riding freight cars looking for work. He told me about learning to be a telegrapher for the railway and that the railroad employees were the first to be issued Social Security cards. Something that caused him problems the rest of his life because the number started with 701.

He told me about coming to California to live with his Aunt Mae whose husband was the editor of the Los Angeles Times Mirror. He was going to go to UCLA but WWII got in the way and after serving in the Army Calvary he finally graduated from UCLA and became an elementary school teacher.

My Dad was more of a mother than my mother. He was the one who changed our diapers, cleaned us up when we were hurt or sick, got up early to be with us on Saturday morning when it was just the farm report on and we had to wait for Buster Keaton movies and Mighty Mouse. He was also the one who blacked my eyes and occasionally beat the shit out of me but he also is the one who said he was sorry before he died and that healed almost all the wounds because I knew that unlike my mother who was indifferent at best to me, he cared.

He was the one who took us to museums and made sure the botany mad 10 year old got to see Luther Burbank’s house on a family vacation when everything else was famous authors and state and national parks.

I miss my daddy today and holding his big hand so like mine grew to be. I miss the smell of Old Spice, Brylcream and Aqua Velva.

Preschool projects

Cool project!



Little and I worked on this project the other day. First she separated and sorted all of the bands by color. Then we used Youtube to find out how to make the bracelet and then we went out to the laundry line to find a clothes pin.

We were about half way done here, and it occurred to me that this would be a great little protection trinket.

“keep me safe, keep me sound
while my wrist you are wrapped around.
I will be out of harms way
all through the night and day”

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Today’s reading



Six of Arrows

Travelling or movement toward new possibilities or cycles, possibly within yourself.

Possibly an anxious or testing time, but harnessing positive energies will add momentum.

You have turned your back on one phase of your life, and head towards a homecoming of the soul.

Travel. Moving home. An emotional retreat.

Bank Hell and Amazon

There are times I really, really, really hate my bank which is why a lot of my money is in my credit union where Citibank can’t touch it. The person who programmed their fraud sensing database is an illiterate idiot who never orders books or other items from Amazon. I’ve had a freeze and had to get a new card for alleged fraudulent activity at least 4 times and probably more since 3 times were within 6 months. Why? Because I ordered books from Amazon and since they were from used book providers or other vendors within Amazon and they were charged separately. You can get a used book for a penny sometimes and just pay shipping. Something I loved when I was unemployed and I read a lot of books that are not in the library or are out of print and now it appears my new Kindle has made the problem worse with $.99 books or books at $1.99. At least this time Citi called me first and again they have put a note in my file, like I said, again!

At one point I was having to call the bank every time I placed an order for multiple books so they wouldn’t flag my card!

It’s bad enough that the NSA can probably see every book you ever bought on Amazon but I feel like the bank discriminates against people who read. Heaven forbid we have an educated populace that might be able to actually think that there is a problem with banks and the government. I hope they enjoy my eclectic reading list. I’m feeling like after having downloaded the free books by Kant, Kirkegard, Camus, St Augustine, Spinoza, Mark Twain and Shopenhouer that I might have to see if there are free copies of Karl Marx and Mein Kampf just to rattle their cages. As I recall, Karl Marx’s writings on love were quite enjoyable when I read them long ago.

Today’s reading



Nine of Cups

Nature’s open-hearted, spiritual cauldron has a welcome for those who approach the waters of knowledge with a compassionate heart.

They are blessed by regeneration. … open to the generous abundance of all around… heartfelt gratitude to the gifts of life; generosity.

Be open to giving and receiving. Life is flowing.