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Brighid Playlist

Bridget – Ruth Barrett & Cyntia Smith
Brighid – Damh the Bard
Brighid’s Flame – Kellianna
Don
Don Oiche UD im Beithil (feat Ruth Barrett)
Holy Water, Scared Flame – Anne Hill
Imbolc – Lisa Thiel
Invocation to Brigid – Ruth Barrett
Brighid’s Kiss – La Lugh
Oiche fa Fheill’ Bride – La Lugh
Brighid of the Sacred Flame – Angela Little
On St Brighid’s Day – Ha’Penny Bridge
Mary of the Gaels – Maire Brennan
Brighid’s Flame – Jon Richards

Brighid prayer

Brighid

I ask your healing for people that I love

I light a candle and make a fervent prayer

That healing comes to those I love

Let me be your flame

Brighid

Let me your ears and hands here

Let me be the eyes that see those that need help

Let healing come through me

Let your waters flow through me

Brighid

I let you use me for what you need to do

Not just every 20 days but every day

Let me be your flame

Let me be your well

Brighid

Let me there for those in need

Let me go with a whole heart

Be thou with me

Let me be your flame

Brighid

Let me be open to helping

Whether it be a baby duck

Or a human being

Let me be your hands of helping

Let me be your waters

Brighid

Let me know when to let go

Let me know when not to step in

Let me know when beings

need to take their own path

Let me be your flame

Brighid

Let me be your hands

Let me be your eyes

Let me be your heart

Let me be your flame

Let me be your flame

Let me be your flame

Kat Robb 04/07/2014

Hymn to Brighid

Hymn to Brighid

Brighid, Lady of flame
Forge of me a link
In the chain
Of strong women
Create a song in my heart
Help me heal with love

Sing me a song of flames
Sing me a song of hammer and anvil
Sing me a song of peace
Sing me a song of creation

Make me strong
Make me shiny
Make me tempered
Make me precious.

Sing me a song of flames
Sing me a song of hammer and anvil
Sing me a song of peace
Sing me a song of creation.

Use me to help
Use me to heal
Use me to create
Use me to make real

Sing me a song of morning
Sing me a song of night
Sing me a song of between times
Sing me a song of your light.

Kat – TOILA Brighid ritual 2001

Healing prayer

Holy Ladies, Great Goddesses, Kwan Yin and Brighid

I ask healing from you

I ask your loving touch and graceful waters

To wash away the pain

To wash my wounds

To wash the healing through my mind and body

I thank you for your attendance on me

The candles are ever lit for you in my heart

And the your waters of your world wash around me

Bless all those who send healing

From their hearts, from their hands and from their souls

May they be blessed as they have blessed me.

I know that healing must be participated in as much as it is bestowed from you

And from those who heal in your names.

I allow my body and soul to soak up the energy and heal

I open my self to receiving your love and healing

I open my self to receiving your avatars love and healing

I open myself to healing.

Cancer is scary as hell or grounding is hard

Do you think they let you load your hospital gown with hematite before surgery? Having trouble sleeping and grounding. I don’t think sleeping will be a problem once the anesthesia kicks in although I have come roaring awake and almost off the table during procedures when something has been done that wasn’t discussed first. I had the hand prints from the nurses trying to make me lie back down the first time.

Now I warn doctors to talk to me even if they think I’m out like a light and my gastro said I’m really hard to anesthetize. Guess that red headed thing is true. Redheads allegedly need more anesthetic and more painkiller than non redheads. Last time I was at the dentist we got up to 13 shots of novocaine for a tooth cleaning. My nerves aren’t where they belong either.

On the other hand, I’m perfectly capable of an out of body experience and have done that too when I got really sick once at camp and had 105 fever and an infection after minor surgery. I remember sitting in the corner of the ceiling watching everyone run around my unconscious body and thinking, I so do not care. They even dropped me on the way to the car and I just couldn’t be bothered to go back and when I got there I woke up slightly and they gave me a shot of fenergan and the nurse remarked she had never had someone not complain about the pain of the shot. The next morning when I was brought back and they remembered to take my blood pressure it was 80/60.

So I need to stay grounded in my body no matter what and not become a little pink cloud and decide I need to float off somewhere because I see something pretty in the distance.

Grounding can be hard. When I’m grounded I sleep easily almost the moment I lay down, when I’m not grounded I don’t sleep or I have disturbed sleep. I haven’t had a good night sleep in a while. The monsters under the bed called “What if” come out and run around at 3:00 am. Somehow my sister’s cat knows this and sometimes she comes down the hall and drapes herself over me and purrs. It’s pretty good at scaring the “what ifs” away. After over 30 years in the Craft I know just about every grounding meditation known to humankind and have made up a few of my own but sometimes you can become immune to it for lack of a better term and the monsters are overwhelming. I did discover the Underground Apps on Kindle and they have some pretty cool nature jigsaw puzzles and if you crank the piece number up you can really keep one going and it becomes mindless. Colouring only works if I turn on the light and that would disturb my sister.

When I’m awake during the day, I’m pretty calm and pretty much accepting of what is coming but at night all bets are off. I worry about them having to resect my bowels like they say they might. I worry that the reason my leg is getting numb is that it’s pressing on spinal nerves. I worry about catheters and their propensity to be high ways for germs. I worry if I’m scaring people or disappointing them in some way. I worry about my sister and the fact that if something happens to me, she is the last one in the family and will be alone. I worry about all kinds of stupid shit. When I was little I worried about everything to the point of tearing out all the hair on both sides of my head a hair at a time before my eye surgery because in those days you didn’t talk to kids about hospitals and I overheard them talking and just snatched myself bald including eyelashes and eyebrows by the time they told me and they figured out why my hair was disappearing.

I grew out of it after I moved out of my parent’s house pretty much. It does come back from time to time like when I was off work but at the moment the screaming mimis are running around at night and they haven’t got a nanny. I visualize them as the bad Minions sometimes. I love the Minions but not these guys.

I’m probably blowing everything out of proportion but cancer is scary no matter how you slice it. It’s just scary as hell.

 

Cancer and my spiritual path

Someone commented somewhere else that they couldn’t understand what a cancer diagnosis had to do with spirituality. Something I became readily aware of that regardless of whether I survive or not, it has everything to do with my spirituality. All three of the Goddesses I’m ordained to are healing  goddesses of some sort because even a goddess associated with death is a healing goddess. I’m inclined to think that my relationship with Brighid, Hecate and Quan Yin is going to become a different relationship than it has been when my health problems were of the chronic sort and not the acute sort.

Depending on whose stats you look at Ovarian cancer has a really bad survival rate some put it as low as 24%. I hope to beat that 24% and raise it but one never knows what cards you are going to draw.  A lot depends on the stage and whether it has spread. It could be attached to my intestines or my bladder or both. Because I have some numbness in my right leg it could be doing nasty things to my spinal nerves and because I have plaques in my lower lung it could have gone travelling there which I guess is quite common according to my obgyn.

They have told me the hospital stay could be from 4-7 days next week. A seven day hospital stay does not sound like any fun to me. I haven’t had a stay that long since my eye operation as a kid and that really wasn’t any fun at all. At least now I can fight back if a nurse hurts me, when I was little I couldn’t even see it coming.

Tonight I’m going to light a 7 day Brighid candle, to start the process. If I’m not too sick next Monday night maybe I’ll post how it went. I might not depending on what the prognosis is and how well I’m processing that information.

I have to say it has made me more attentive to things. The first bird I heard yesterday was a crow, this morning some crazy mockingbird was singing in the rain. And we have our long awaited rain and it’s supposed to stay all week.

So I look up and out and treasure each moment. I treasure all the friends that have said encouraging things here and on Facebook. For some reason at the moment I’m not scared. I probably should be but not having the cancer out is not an option but it’s just a first step.

I wish Laura or Mary had talked more about what they were going through. I wish I knew what they had thought or faced. I know each journey is personal and I’m a pretty private person but maybe I can help someone else in this situation or not.

I did think it’s pretty funny that there are so many men that want to be women right now but will never know the truth about being a woman and owning the parts of a woman that can turn around and kill you. They’ll be women when they can get ovarian, uterine, cervical and have a higher rate of breast cancer, until then, they aren’t women.

Flameshift

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Every day and every night that I say the genealogy of Brighid
I shall not be killed
I shall not be harmed
I shall not be put into a cell
I shall not be wounded

No fire, no sun, no moon shall burn me
No lake, no water, no sea shall drown me.

For I am the child of Poetry,
Poetry, child of Reflection,
Reflection, child of Meditation,
Meditation, child of Lore,
Lore, child of Research,
Research, child of Great Knowledge,
Great Knowledge, child of Intelligence,
Intelligence, child of Comprehension,
Comprehension, child of Wisdom,
Wisdom, child of Brighid.
Carmina Gaedelica edited by Lunea Weatherstone

May my words be as considered as poetry,
May I reflect on all I do or say,
May I meditate on those things important spiritually
May I seek to know more of the lore
May I research what I am curious about and what will enable me to grow
May I seek to know great knowledge,
May I acknowledge the intelligence of others
May I comprehend what I seek to learn and apply those lessons
May I know that seeking wisdom is not the same as being wise.
May I be a child of Brighid.

SelfBlessing is by me

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Brighid, bean-oirdheirc
Lasrach grad
Fetaim lasrach soillse
Thoir cuireadh sinne
ris a’ bheatha
mhaireannach`

Brighid, Sublime Woman
Quick flame
Long may you burn bright!
You give us the invitation
to life everlasting

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