I was watching TV today while folding the laundry. That’s when I saw a promo for a new show.
Genius, I thought.
I didn’t even have to watch the clip to know what it was all about.
Every week, a random person would be “butched,” or given a butch makeover. This would involve cargo shorts, a T-shirt or polo shirt, new sneakers, maybe a baseball cap or even a tattoo.
Because everyone knows butches have more fun.
There would be instructions on how to give the butch nod, what beverage to order with lunch (beer), what beverage to order with dinner (beer), how to walk with a swagger, tie a Windsor knot, sing along to Melissa Etheridge songs in the car, open a jar of pickles without showing effort and respond to “can I help…
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I don’t like the term ‘matriarchy’ as it implies a society where men are treated as badly as women are treated under patriarchy; ‘matricentric’ and ‘matrilineal’ are both more appropriate and more accurate.
There is no society on earth, past or present where men are considered to be chattel. There is no society on earth, past or present where baby boys are murdered purely for being boys (the Ancient Spartans may have exposed more baby boys than baby girls, but that was because of their very high standards for a healthy boy, not because of any kind of ‘man hating’), where boy children are routinely raped by adult women, and sold into marriage to adult women, or where men and boys are trafficked into prostitution to service adult women.
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There is always someone calling names. For some of us it started when we started school
FOUR-EYES! SHIKSA! BLIND AS A BAT!
My first memories of first grade are the boys calling me names. I was the only kid in glasses. I was the only kid with disabilities and the only non-Jew in my class. That area of North Hollywood was almost exclusively Jewish. Teachers that were Jewish made it clear that I wasn’t wanted too. I remember an older boy running up behind me while I was waiting in line to go into my first grade class and knocking me down and stepping on the back of my head and breaking my glasses. No one did anything about him or did anything to stop him. Thank you, Mrs Soloman!
Or the time in 3rd grade the teacher announced to the whole class after state testing that I was reading at 10th grade level. It took all of 30 seconds at recess for the pinches and punches to start because the teacher added that the rest of them shouldn’t let a Gentile do better than them. So Thank you Mrs Camp!
EGGHEAD! KNOW IT ALL! SHOWOFF!
It’s no different now. Boys and men call names. They do it to hurt and to control. There are so many names they call women to hurt.
BITCH! WHORE! CUNT!
The problem with name calling is that eventually you get de-sensitized to it. When most people start getting called names in Junior Hi or now, middle school, they can’t handle it. This caused a weird problem for me when I was called names again in Junior Hi. I had been so bullied in my elementary school before we finally moved that I didn’t recognize it or pay attention. This lead to a weird sort of admiration on the part of some people because I didn’t react. They didn’t know that I by then had learned not to hear it.
TOOTHPICK! WASHBOARD! THERMOMETER!
Oh those were so original. Yeah, I knew I was skinny and flat chested but I’m smarter than you. So what! It went in one ear and out the other. Are the names supposed to tell me something I don’t already know? My dad was fond of teasing me at that point. He’d say “two peas of a washboard” but I could wear an undershirt and not one of those awful contraptions with stays like my gym partner who was a 40d in 7th grade and always had bandaids under her bra.
DYKE! LEZZIE! And from the really stupid, FAGGOT!
Words used by men again to shame and control but what if there is no shame? I’m not ashamed to be an out lesbian. I have been since 1979. There is nothing wrong with loving people who are like yourself and look like you do.
WITCH! HAG! CRONE!
More words to control women, Heaven forbid we show that we are aging. We are all supposed to look 20 forever? Hell no! I wouldn’t go back to be 20 for anything. I like that I’m aging! I like that I have grey and white hair. Not so found of the things like arthritis but then I got that diagnosis when I was 9 and had already been in dance and gymnastics for 3 years. And yes, I’m a Witch, I have been for over 30 years. Tell me something I don’t know. Names again to control how a woman behaves and lives. Even the worst word a boy could be called in grade school made sure the other boys thought he was feminine. “Sissy!”
TERF! CIS! SWERF!
So now we have the latest words to come along and again they are being used on women by men to shame them into behaving. This kind of male, when they were six, were mean and evil and now when they are grown and claiming they have the non-existent “laydee brain” are still mean and evil and they need to grow up. It didn’t work then and it ain’t going to work now.
I’m rubber you’re glue, what you say bounces off me and sticks to you!
By Cyntia Smith and Ruth Barrett
Hear my words, I’m calling from your heart
And calling from your mind
I am the spark that kindles the flame
And nurtures all mankind
For a jewel of light has been at every root
And lies within the soil’s clay
And it cradles the babe of our visions and dreams
And sends all creation into flight.
Take my hand, I’ll pull to free your stance
I pull only at first
And when you push on to make out a path
The waiting seed pods burst
There’s a fountain that flows and deep within the rock
And satisfies the thirst in all.
And it cools the brow when the hammer falls
And smooths the way for the birth.
So speak my name, I’ll come to any door
And come at any hour
And when you raise your voice and your heart
Your innocence is power
And the healing of love can sweeten bitter taste
And wash the poison from the wound
And it fills every sail to ride upon the sea
And guides every vessel homeward bound.
Day 4 is for favourite myths or stories – This isn’t really a myth but it is a story about what we do:
People who are new to this blog may have noticed a weird thing that appears on my blog every 20 days. Well, every 20 days when I remember to do it online.
The flame is an ancient tradition thought to date back to the 6th century. It is an eternal flame kept in Kildare Ireland. Originally dedicated to the Goddess Brighid (Brigid) by 19 priestesses and on the 20th day the flame was said to be kept by Brighid herself. At the coming of the Christian Era the Church couldn’t beat the worship of the Goddess so they created the saint Brigid and at Kildare the flame continued to be tended by 19 nuns. The Archibishop of London ordered it put out in 1220 but was unsuccessful but King Henry VIII was successful in driving it underground. The flame was kept in Norway by Norwegian Brigantine Sisters until it was brought back to Kildare in Ireland in 1993 at the opening of a conference on peace and justice. Since then it has been tended in Kildare by Brigidine Sisters at their centre called Solas Bhride.
A new tradition was born however on that same day in Canada by a group called Daughters of the Flame. The flame is tended at hearths around the world every 20 days. I belong to a group called Ord Brighideach who are Flamekeepers who are pagan. There is another group for Christians who follow the saint. The Flame is kept by cells of 19 people who take a shift every 20 days of flame keeping. This doesn’t mean they don’t keep the flame on other days just that they promise to do it on their given day.
What is Flamekeeping? It is a day where at least some of it is dedicated to honouring the healing aspect of Brighid as well as her other aspects of inspiration metal craft. Everyone has their own ways of flamekeeping. One is supposed to devote some or all of the day to prayer/mediation/ritual or contemplation. Some Flamekeepers do it with only a real physical flame. Some use a digital flame and some use a combination of both. I do both since I can’t light a candle in the car or at work. If I light it on my blog I know that flame will stay lit and it’s also a lot safer in an earthquake. At home I use a glass novena candle.
Most of us use candles that at some point in their history have been touched by a candle that was lit from the original flame in Kildare but it really isn’t necessary if you really want to do it. Our group with in the Temple of Isis was the largest group outside of Ireland allegedly at one point but that’s because we’re all in one place. And I think all the Flamekeepers were all ordained to the goddess Brighid as part of their ordination. Most of the TOILA women were ordained to at least 3 goddesses but not all. Most Flamekeepers are solitary and spread all over the world. Most Flamekeepers are women but there are cells that are co-ed and one that is male only. The rest are women only.
So when I say I’m adding you to my Flamekeeper list I’m adding you the group I send energy as I keep the flame and I do it as necessary not just my day.
If you would like to join Ord Brighideach here is the link to the website: http://www.ordbrighideach.org/raven/
There are FAQs there that explain more. I’m in Cill Elder, 3rd shift.