I had a weird experience last night. I’m back taking the bus until I can afford to get my car repaired. There were a lot of people fighting on the bus. It was hot and people were crammed on the bus. On front of me a woman claiming to be a grandmother started screaming at the girl who got on the bus and stepped on her by accident. The alleged grandmother was way younger than me and started yelling at the girl for disrespecting the elderly.
In self defense I started to send out calming energy and it seemed to work because people calmed down and rode quietly for awhile. I got off at my stop and started to walk home. There is a nursing home I have to walk pass to get home. As I started to walk past I tears started to run down my face and I got a feeling of grief and something whooshed past through me into the night. It was also really cold right there and it was still about 77 degrees. I checked my phone to make sure it really was warm. And when I finished walking past the buildings in was gone.
My conclusion is that someone in the nursing home had just died and I felt it. It really was the oddest feeling to have someone whizz through you on the way to somewhere else and it happened just as I was passing by the patient rooms. I must have been wide open from what I was doing on the bus and forgot to bring everything back up.
I’ve only done the involuntary crying thing once before and that was in England. In 1982 my mom sent me alone for a month in Britain allegedly for my college graduation but with the subtext of getting me away from my first lover who she didn’t really like. She didn’t know we’d already broken up.
The first few days I had alone in London before having to join a British based tour company who by the way I really liked because they treated you like a grown up. They took you to place, told you about and then left you alone to explore. My kind of tour group.
Anyway, my hotel was the Tower Hotel near the Tower of London and the Tower Bridge and late the second afternoon I decided to go through the Tower of London by myself. It was about 4 in the afternoon and early in May so I was almost alone wandering around and I decided to go through a dark tunnel. I got halfway across and all of a sudden I had a flood of tears running down my face and I was kind of freaked out because I had no clue why. I wasn’t even feeling sad the moment before and I got to the other end of the tunnel. I guess I had gone the wrong way and saw the sign. “Bridge of Tears”. It was the tunnel they took the prisoners through on the way to the headmen’s axe. Still remember feeling pretty shook up and wondering what I had just done but other than the other night that is the only bout of involuntary tears I think I’ve ever had.