Archive | May 21, 2012

Lighting my candle for Neil!

Every day and every night that I say the geneology of Brighid
I shall not be killed
I shall not be harmed
I shall not be put into a cell
I shall not be wounded

No fire, no sun, no moon shall burn me
No lake, no water, no sea shall drown me.

For I am the child of Poetry,
Poetry, child of Reflection,
Reflection, child of Meditation,
Meditation, child of Lore,
Lore, child of Research,
Research, child of Great Knowledge,
Great Knowledge, child of Intelligence,
Intelligence, child of Comprehension,
Comprehension, child of Wisdom,
Wisdom, child of Brighid.
Carmina Gaedelica edited by Lunea Weatherstone

May my words be as considered as poetry,
May I reflect on all I do or say,
May I meditate on those things important spiritually
May I seek to know more of the lore
May I research what I am curious about and what will enable me to grow
May I seek to know great knowledge,
May I acknowledge the intelligence of others
May I comprehend what I seek to learn and apply those lessons
May I know that seeking wisdom is not the same as being wise.
May I be a child of Brighid.

SelfBlessing is by me

Brighid, bean-oirdheirc
Lasrach grad
Fetaim lasrach soillse
Thoir cuireadh sinne
ris a’ bheatha

Brighid, Sublime Woman
Quick flame
Long may you burn bright!
You give us the invitation
to life everlasting

I vant to be alone!

I’ve been stressing over a lack of creative ideas and I think I’ve figured it out. I’m tired, physically and mentally. I’ve been doing a new job that hopefully will be permanent and I’ve had mandatory overtime every day since it started back in March.

I’ve been working 10 days Monday – Friday and a minimum of 4 hours on the weekend. Most Sundays I have been an immovable object except for laundry and having to take the bus to places like Target and walking to the market. I’ve been taking a bus or a train everywhere and writing about being an INTJ last week was the first trigger and going to the Amgen bike race surrounded by thousands of people and then a party filled with people I love and love to engage with was the second trigger. My poor I (introvert) has been surrounded by too many people and not enough downtime. So if I can make it to next weekend without killing someone or collapsing in exhaustion, I’m taking all three days off. Alison wants to go to the Highland Games but the car probably won’t be fixed in time and I am NOT taking buses down to Costa Mesa. So the only thing I have to do is going to the Museum to see Cleopatra on Sunday with TOILA. The rest of the time I intend to be vewy, vewy quwiet.

Because this introvert is one that needs a certain amount of quiet to be creative. I do need to be in public or at least out in the world to generate ideas but it needs to be followed with alone time to incubate them. No incubation time means no stories.

Introverts are not shy. Introverts ARE territorial and need space, space that can not be barged in on by extroverts because they can’t be alone or be quiet and have to bother someone else to relieve their inability to be alone with their own thoughts. I miss living alone. I lived alone for 12 years until my dad died and I moved in with my sister.

One of the biggest reasons I did not take that too-good-to-be-true job was the playpen cubicle. That would just have been torture to be on display and in the open all day long and no amount of money would have made it worth it. Need another example? Think Sheldon and his couch space on the “Big Bang Theory”. He isn’t being selfish or even particularly weird. That is his space and he needs to know that his space, AKA his territory, is just that, his. Then he can relax in company and the other guys understand that and know it. It’s Penny, the extrovert who doesn’t understand it. You do not mess with an introvert’s space and that includes head space. Extroverts love to barge in on people they see just sitting there because they are obviously not doing anything important, I mean, they are sitting there staring. Never mind that they may have just had a great idea for a story that went out the window when came tromping in. Never mind that when they are thinking they are the most vulnerable and most likely to act in an anti-social fashion at the most and jump out their skin because they were thinking something and didn’t hear you coming. The Extrovert couldn’t SEE them doing anything important so it wasn’t.

Which brings up another thing about Extroverts, they’re handsy. They go through the world touching everything and everyone. What’s this? What’s that? And get offended if you say put it down and don’t touch. They will barge into a cubicle past the occupant to do it. Really? I don’t do this in your space, why are you doing it in mine?

Part of the problem is also taking the bus. It may be good for the environment and a whole lot cheaper but driving was my thinking and meditation time. This is not possible when riding public transportation. I do not understand the people who can sleep on the bus or for that matter the people who yack into their phones the minute they get on the bus. Really? You can’t just sit still for a moment and read a book or play a game or listen to music. Then there is the one male that demands attention from someone and heaven help the introvert that ends up on the bus with him especially if the bus isn’t crowded. First they jiggle something and if that doesn’t work and you are trying to read what ever is jiggling will slowly be moved into your line of sight and slowly into your space so that you have to acknowledge their presence in the world. This is where my best schoolmarm stare is employed because they are acting like a 5 year old. Or his counterpart that sits with his legs spread wide open so he takes up half of your space too. I objected to one man doing this and he told me I took up too much space. HE was shoving me into the wall of the bus!

I need some alone time. I love my new job but this is making me seriously uncreative and nuts.

Peanut Brittle

2 cups sugar
2/3 cup light corn syrup
2/3 cup water
2 TBSP butter
2 cups raw Spanish peanuts (I bet you could use salted if you like your brittle a little salty)
1 TBSP soda

Combine sugar, corn syrup and water in a heavy saucepan and boil until reaches soft ball stage (yes, you need a candy thermometer)
Add butter and peanuts, boiling until the mixture is amber coloured
Add baking soda
Remove from heat and pour onto a buttered pan or platter
As soon as cool enough to handle pull out thin. 
Break into pieces when cooled.