I think the government should get rid of the NSA, the TSA and the CIA and start employing the FOCU. I swear, can now scan your brain and reconstruct what you are dreaming or observing FOCU would be perfect. What is FOCU? it’s the Feline Observation Control Unit. Every cat in our neighborhood is a window observer. They see everything. Whether out on the prowl on their own or from any upstairs or downstairs window and that doesn’t even count what they see from the inside. They know what’s in your closets because they have inspected it thoroughly.

They are better than Santa Claus. They know when you’ve been sleeping. They know when you’re awake. They know when you’ve been bad or good and the little blackmailers demand payment or they will whee on your shoes or poop on the carpet and that doesn’t include the midnight squish of a fresh hairball.

All the government has to do is wire up a few cats and they will save the country from its deficit and maybe get some of them some exercise chasing down those cats. Write your congressman and ask them to put FOCU in action now!