Archive | August 1, 2006

When I chose the song from “Wicked” to remember Cam I had many reasons, it wasn’t just because it’s a lovely song and it’s appropriate for the 2 of us.

It’s because Mom and Dad read to us and the way they discovered I could read at three was because Mom was reading one of the Oz books to us. Cam was infuriated that Mom did not start where she had left off and she always left off at some exciting part. They figured out I had read ahead but I forgot to put it back in the right place and Cam was really mad.

We both loved fantasy and science fiction. He stole the Fairy tale book Grandma gave me after my eye operation and put his name on it. That time I got mad. He crayoned in MY book.
We were always trading books. I loved Danny Dunn and the Mad Scientists Club. We both read fairy tales. When I took library science in eighth grade I discovered Anne McCaffrey and Robert Heinlein and brought those home.

He took me to the first Star Wars movie at the Platt because He insisted that this was a movie that I would love and I did. We both read the Lord of the Rings at the same time in the 70’s.

The last book he finished was the last Harry Potter.

Oz was always a very special place for us. We always watched the movie as a family thing and when we got the colour tv in when we were in high school I still remember my awe at seeing it go from sepia to colour. If he went to Oz he’d be happy now.

I had told him about “Wicked” when I read it and I don’t know if he read it but I know he and Scott were going to go see it when it came back to SF. (I think they had seen it before it went to Broadway up there from something he said).Ali and I had seen it down here right before he died and I had already gotten the soundtrack before the show. And “For Good” was my favourite song when I heard it and I told him that in a phone call.

So those are some of the reasons I picked it. He would have liked it, I think.

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We didn’t go to Dizzyland. Ali decided she wanted to hibernate and because for her it also meant getting her car serviced it meant I stayed home too.

So, since I was already ready to cry at the drop of a hat I went through the stuff of Cam’s Scott dropped off when he was down here for the Square Dance con. Damn that was hard. There was stuff I either gave him or didn’t know he had. I didn’t touch the slide boxes. A watch with Piglet on it I gave him for Christmas, A brass rabbit just because it’s a rabbit, Great-Grandpa’s pocket-watches, what the hell was he doing with my Junior Hi Campfire Tie? His glasses, my dad’s jewelry and some of his, things that make you go I remember that and then start leaking like a watering can. My sister kept telling me to stop but jeez, if you are already half way there, rip the god-damned bandaid off and finish it.

Today I went to the dentist and ever since I’ve been light-headed. I made the dentist so upset he had to leave twice. I upset him ’cause he didn’t numb me enough amd I reacted. Evidently he doesn’t like inflicting pain and it upsets him. AND HE BECAME A DENTIST?

As I’ve said I don’t fear many things but the dentist is a real big one and deep cleaning isn’t my favourite thing for obvious reasons like I’m hard to numb. THe assistant was so funny. She kept telling me I was distressing him. Oh yeah, right, he isn’t getting poked with a big needle and a screaming scraper that has a really horrible high pitch.

And now I just feel like I could faint without too much provocation. The numbness wore off in a staff meeting so at least I don’t have a drooping lip and sound like “Mushmouth” from “Fat Albert”.