Saturday’s memorial was really weird for me, especially since I had a really good time, at least at the second part. Cam had to be mightily amused since Alison and I haven’t been in a church since dad’s funeral.
I have to admit I was absolutely terrified to read. Usually reading or speaking at rituals are no big deal but I got my cousin Stacy to make faces at me so I wouldn’t cry. She and Jon got roped into carrying fire at the service and wearing robes as acolytes. I tried to get them to take some earth and water with them since the water was already there but no go. But Stacy said she thought about doing it Sunday. I’m glad Jon’s wife Carol sat with Alison and I in the pew. Geez, why do they make family members sit in front? What happened to the booth in the back in the dark? Everyone sees you leaking like a sieve if you sit in front. Plus Alison and I weren’t exactly participating just being respectfully quiet. The second part was more like a pagan memorial. I loved meeting Cam’s friends.
It turned out one of mine was there and knew Cam. He knew Donavan, bigreddee. I used to work with him at Prudential where the out gay people were few and far between.
When I came out my lover and I joined Pasadena City College’s GLSU ( it was ’79 before all the extra initals) and promptly got dumped and gained a lot of gay big brothers. I realized that I have missed that energy in my life since most of them have gone to the big disco in the sky, mostly I miss Art, my best friend. He used to insist on taking me with him to cruise Griffith Park and wondered why no one would come up to him, silly man. Scott gave me the best gift. Cam had taken a picture of Art and I in the Parade and it was in one of Cam’s scrapbooks.
I felt very comforted on Saturday to know Cam had so many wonderful people loving him. I was really pleased to finally meet some LJ’er’s. Because I had read so many of your thoughts about Cam.